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Almost Naked Adventures

Part One

I still remember that dreadful day...

The cold, damp morning, tainted soil, and the rushing sound of water seemed to awaken me from my nightmares. Grogily, I sat up and looked around. The forest... it seemed uncanny, but that's where I was. I wasn't at home, or at an Inn in some town... I was in the middle of the forest. I stood up and stretched, and felt leather cutting into my flesh - my dagger sheath on my arm must've gotten wet... I looked down in shock at my body! I was stripped of all my clothes! Well, not all my clothes... They left me my smiley face boxers... My sword and sheild were intact, and my Inventory was still in good condition. All that was missing was my clothes! As if my morning could've gotten worse, just then, it started to rain....

From the Journal of Vyatcheslav Petrovskov
- July 14 - The year of the Antwerp

Shivering and cold, Vyatcheslav reluctantly walked the path beneath his feet towards the sound of the rushing water. The grass on the path tickled his toes as he walked, revealing that the path had not been used in some time.

Part Two

“I slowly trekked forwards towards the sound of the water, hoping to get the foul dirt off me in some way. The light rain coming down in spurts, as if it wasn’t sure if it wanted to help me or not… As I neared the water, I felt the ground shift beneath me…”

From the Journal of Vyatcheslav Petrovskov
- July 14 - The year of the Antwerp

Vyatcheslav paused, tensing with an automatic reflex as something subtly changed in the forest around him. He paused uneasily, trying to decide whether to run or stay put, when the Mantray appeared.

Now, normally creatures don’t just “poof” into existence, you know – they come charging at you from the bushes or drop down onto your head. This might unnerve you a bit, but it’s normal. Mantrays, however, sort of just “appear” magically – not quite “poof,” but still, it’s weird. And it can really discombobulate even the most experienced of adventurers.

Our Hero was not the most experienced of adventurers. “Shit.” He swore under his breath, his eyes fixed nervously on its rainbow-coloured wings that flapped nonchalantly, slowly circling him. This is a tactic used in battle for its remarkable psychological powers. It’s unlikely that the Mantray was really intending to have such an effect, but it did. Vyatcheslav felt a cord of nervousness bunch inside of him only seconds before it snapped, and suddenly he found himself picking up a rock. “Damn vulture!” He shouted at it and then threw his rock, striking it firmly on a harmless spot on the wing. And then he realized what he’d done.

The Mantray’s tail jerked upward in startled surprise and it shrieked angrily. Vyatcheslav had about three seconds to curse himself before it lunged at him at an insane speed. And then he ran. Unfortunately for our hero, he forgot that turning one’s back on an angry, charging creature when one has naught but boxers and a pitifully small shield for protection is one of the stupidest things you can do. Right next to flavouring yourself in their favourite food and walking into their dens.

The flight lasted an exciting three minutes as he charged madly through the forest – and then the Mantray quit playing, used its superior speed, and stabbed him in the side with its wicked tail. His scream echoed and re-echoed through the forest, but he was not willing to fight. Onward he ran as the venom spread through his system, slow enough for him to feel the pain as it fought with his internal defense forces. The Mantray followed much more slowly, waiting for its prey to drop to the ground before it began its feast.

Vyatcheslav was exhausted. He slowed, every breath bringing a sharp stab of pain to his side that threatened to push him over. The icy fingers of death grabbed him, hungering, struggling to pull him down into its arms. But he hung on, even as he ceased being more than vaguely aware of his surroundings. As though from far away, he felt his feet stumble into water, and then his body dropped down and the cold of water spread over all of him. His eyes refused to open, and his lungs were screaming at him to give them a rest. The last thing he was aware of before passing into unconsciousness was the faraway and fading beating of his heart…

Part Three

“I know it’s a bit cliché, but today… this man - this well-toned, rugged man fell for me! Literally. I was bathing under the Mirror Falls when I heard a loud splash. When I turned around – covering myself, I mind you… The limp body of the most gorgeous man I had ever set eyes upon was floating lifelessly in the water in front of me.”

From the Diary of Anastasia Kovich

Now, one thing that one misses out as one is passing out is just where you happen to be landing in your unconscious state. You may have already figured out (bravo for you) that Vyatcheslav landed in a shallow creek.. However, since the story there was from his perspective and we just mentioned what he did see, you probably didn’t figure that he also landed right at the top of a waterfall.

Mirror “river” is actually far more a creek than a river, but it’s still a body of moving water. Vyatcheslav, lying unconscious in the creek bed, was pushed over the falls in minutes while a hovering Mantray watched in dismay. The Mantray was about to go after him, when a far larger and more accessible morsel appeared. And now the Mantray is gone.

Over the falls Vyatcheslav tumbled, near death and unconscious. He hit the bottom with a splash, floated down, and then up again, his face in the water. A startled scream accompanied his splash. Of course, it does make sense that a beautiful woman would make a noise of exclamation when she’s bathing herself and then something large props into the water behind her. Hastily covering herself, Anastasia turned around and looked for the disturbance. She didn’t have to look far. Quite the fitting meeting. Our Scantily Clad Adventurer fell hopelessly for a Naked Maiden. Unfortunately, he was unconscious for all of it.

Fortunately for our hero, Anastasia was not a woman to be freaked out by nearly naked, almost dead men dropping in on her when she was bathing, and quickly grabbing some clothes, she pulled Vyatcheslav to shore. She pressed her palm against his neck, feeling for his pulse. “Faint, but alive.” She said to no one in particular. Being from experienced families, she also recognized the symptoms of poisoning. She was about to search through his inventory for poison cure pills when two things caught her attention: a pair of bright yellow and white Smiley Face Boxers, and a puddle of recently expelled blood on the ground.

Despite the seriousness of the situation, she had to crack a smile at the silliness of the boxers even as she looked for the wound. She found it – the puncture wound of a Mantray, and it looked bad. Quickly, she pulled off his backpack and searched for something that would stop the bleeding, and found some poison cure pills. Laying that aside for the moment, she rifled as quickly as possible through his pack as she could, but all she could find was some duct tape and a few pieces of terrycloth.

Shrugging mentally, she hastily duct-taped the terry cloth onto the wound, and turned her attention to his poison. All she had were the pills, and no liquid. She frowned, trying to think of a way to get it down him. Finally, she just pried open his mouth, placed the pills on his tongue, and propped him up on her… bosom. She forced water into his mouth and onto his face. Gurgling and coming to just a bit, he choked on the water and the pills, but automatically swallowed and didn’t die from the cure. Anastasia breathed a sigh of relief and went to put on some clothes.